If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!

In the beginning God created the DP.
God saw the DP and said he was good.
The DP saw God and said: “Turn your head, I’d rather have it back-lit.”
God said:”But I am God!”
The DP said:”I don’t care who you are. Front-lighting is no good.”
And God turned his head.

The logical evolution of the iPhone will be a small form factor iPhone shuffle. Someone leaked the instruction video on youTube:

Update

The ad has been leaked as well now:

1. Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people-whether they are employed or not.
2. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.
3. Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don’t worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one.
4. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.
5. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts: your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
6. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.
7. If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.
8. Honest and hard working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.
9. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers, and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.
10. All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach the armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.
11. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.
12. It’s easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.
13. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off-even while scuba diving.
14. You’re very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
15. When swimming, hair is always perfectly groomed.
16. When a villian catches the Hero, the villian will first explain how the Hero will be killed. Then the villan will continue explaining his evil master plan. He will then leave - presumably to let the Hero die. Magically, the Hero escapes.
17. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do.
18. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.
19. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.
20. If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.
21. If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.
22. Word processors never display a cursor on screen but will always say: Enter Password Now.
23. Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.
24. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they’re going to go off.
25. Bombs will not be defuse until the last second.
26. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
27. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will know all the steps.
28. Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
29. When they are alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to each other in English
30. It is incredible simple to enlarge a blurry picture to reveal new details.
31. If you are an aging actor, it is best to surround yourself with very young love interests. No one will notice you age any longer.
32. No matter how big an army, and how many machine guns the soldiers have - a hero will always succeed in killing them all.
33. A hero can effortlessly kill 150 nasty guys. But the moment the Big Baddie arrives, the following fight will lasts minutes.

I have previously written about Microsoft’s attempt at making a mobile phone (here and here), but now the first two spec ads have been leaked:

and

“Everyone” seems to be talking about the iPhone. “Everyone” seems to want one. Truth is, most people don’t really care. And the truth is also, of all the people who really do want one, most simply can not get one:There is still no word as to when (or even if) the iPhone will come to Norway and Scandinavia.

And as to all the buzz around the $200 rebate, here is a link to Steve Jobs’ First Letter of Apology.

Before the iPhone came out, I posted a spoof video about what the iPhone would be capable of. Turns out that some hacker managed to add some of that bespoke functionality (minus the hand granade):
(via)

After the merely luke-warm reception of Microsoft’s previous offer of free phones to Bloggers, the Redmont company has now adapted their marketing strategy for their upcoming mobile phone project. Tranferring Vista’s “Quantity before clarity” campaign, they will offer the same phone in many different versions. Additonally to the zPhone, Microsoft has plans for an expected 6 other flavours. For one of the models, the oPhone (with built-in oTone (offering downloadable music) for the teen-ager market, and oZone (automatic adjustment for clima quotes) for the business traveller), had just an instructional video leaked:

(Video via Sparkplug9)

One of the things I really like about Google - besides, of course them having a very good search engine - is that they have a sense of humor. Take for example Google maps, and punch in driving directions from New York to Oslo. Then have a look at line # 24.

Btw, it used to be that the first 2 entries you got when googling for “failure” were George W. Bush, followed by Michael Moore. It turns out that this was not Google humor. And Google has changed it since.

Edit sep. 2008: Seems that Google is becoming more and more serious. For historical reference: the result used to be that you were being told to swim from New York to Norway. Now it simply states that it cannot calculate a route. Sigh…

Just came across this short documentary about the brain behind the current U.S. President’s speeches:

…and it’s a Friday, too. Anyways, here are today’s Gems from the Web:

• My favourite quotes - “Imagination is more important than knowledge.” - Albert Einstein
• Wacky laptop tricks - While you are waiting for your MacBook, here are some things that you can do with your laptop.
• Apple Macintosh G3 tossed over a 45-foot cliff - Total destruction, unsurprizingly. But why would anyone want to do this?
• TechRepublic Photo Gallery - Chaoscope fractals showcase the beauty of chaos
• Securing OS X 10.4: Tips from Apple and the NSA - Apple and the National Security Administration (NSA) have published a security guide for Mac OS 10.4 with key highlights on network administration, securing Safari and the importance of physical security.
• Microsoft naysayer bandwagon gets crowded - Goldman Sachs removed Microsoft from its “conviction list,” the equivalent of a super-duper buy list.
• Lawmakers pushing iPods flew on Apple’s dime - Two state lawmakers backing a controversial plan to buy iPods for every schoolchild in Michigan were among a group of politicians who made a trip to California that was paid for at least in part by Apple, the maker of iPods.
• Welcome to Prisma - Imagine, an international company, and their sitemap is not clickable! Hmm…
• Creative Planet’s Digital Production BuZZ - News - Red camera supports the /i Technology, developed by Cooke Optics. /i Technology enables film and digital cameras to automatically record key lens and camera data for every film frame shot and provide it to post-production teams digitally.